I made a firm decision this year to do a Father’s Day dedicated to loving my family. I asked each of them to decide 1 thing to do with me today and I would do it. This idea came from asking how can I best serve my family and be a co-leader in the direction of my family. This is what excited me about Father’s Day this year.
I very much want to employ a servant-leadership dynamic into my family. I may be on the right path but I want it to be stronger. I believe many families would be better having had this. Dads all over would find more joy and less disconnection in their lives if they could find a way to implement servant-leadership principles.
Father’s Day is an opportunity to start.
The Goal for Father’s Day 2019
I have been working on excelling in my family for some time. Does it always work? No, I fail often. I fail by stonewalling, disconnecting, avoiding troubles, having little patience, not supporting, gaslighting, and refusing to change.
Even so, my goals still stand. It was time for me to put family first and elevate their position in my mind, body, and heart. To take the love I think I have for them and put action behind showing them. There are many ways to accomplishing this goal but presence is a big piece of unveiling the mystery behind how to do it. I found that BEING PRESENT with them was the game changer.
My thought then was how do I be present with my family this Father’s Day when society says they are to celebrate me? I put the focus back on them and informed them that this is what I want to do. It sends a different message. One that adds value to my family’s emotional bank (more on that another time).
What We Did
They chose very different things. My wife wanted to clean out the hot tub due to it needing to be cleaned for some time… which we’ve been putting off. It felt great doing this together though bailing it out caused the beginning of a headache for me (which went away).
My oldest daughter wanted to watch a movie. The movie was The Land Before TIme #15, Journey of the Brave. We cuddled on the couch and talked about the film. I left my phone behind.
Deidre is 2.5 years old. She chose to spend time with me by playing a game dubbed “The Sleeping Game.” No, this doesn’t involve me any sleeping (unfortunately). There are sound effects that we play from a music book. 1 of them has the power to put me to sleep. The others I react to (camera taking a picture, door opening, ketchup splatting, someone running, etc…). I chase after them to prevent them from pushing the button that makes me sleep. It was fun and both my girls enjoyed it.
I had some alone time during Father’s Day too in which I caught up on the latest E3 news from the week. We went out to eat with my parents as well to catch up with them and celebrate my dad being a father.
The last part of my night was spent talking with my wife about our spending habits (which she loves talking about and I constantly avoid. She’s better with money) and our future goals. I feel we are more on the same page with each other and have big plans in motion.
It was a very memorable Father’s Day
Do not think I am big on myself for having done this. I probably read about doing this somewhere and forgot where. Also, I didn’t spend the whole day doing things with them. It was just part of the day. I am on a journey to be a better father, servant-leader, and provider like many of the dads I get to know through Facebook groups, counseling, and friendships. Let’s walk together. #dadsolidarity
As always, let me be a resource to you. Ryan: 612-207-9953.